Imgur: https://imgur.com/gallery/day-14-two-weeks-down-qFJjLrG
I had to miss dialysis today because my tummy was upset. This happens from time to time. I’m not happy about it because it’s extra days of fluid buildup and a lack of waste removal from my blood. It probably means the next two days I’m going to be more tired than normal.
And I was already tired today.
I was thinking I’d try to get the walking done sooner today, but I just couldn’t get out there until it started to be late enough that I knew I had to or I wouldn’t. Yay ADHD, yay fatigue, yay for all this stupid crap.
I’m fine, mind. Oh yeah, today was a struggle, but it is every day to some degree. Or at least most days.
This is now two weeks. Out of that, I think maybe two of those times I was, if not excited, at least feeling pretty decent about going out to do the walking. And for definitely more than half, I dreaded it. Like today.
But what’s the alternative? To give up and continue to live in a wheelchair. And if I had to do that, well, I’d take that because being in a chair would be better than being bedbound. And being bedbound would be better than being dead.
But if I don’t have to take that, then I have to work towards getting out of this wheelchair. And that’s what I’m trying to do, day by slow day.
Back to three laps today. My hips were hurting after 1.5, but I knew I could push on and do more. I stopped at 3 because I wasn’t sure I could do 4. I probably could, but I was already hurting a bit. I mean, every day I do this, I’m in at least mild to moderate pain after one to one and a half laps, just count on that. heh.
Two weeks down. A lot more to go.
But I’m here. Every day.
…except for that one day. And that can happen again. And that’s okay. I’m here.